So, lots of good thoughtful comments in here, and yes, I do read and appreciate all the comments I get even though it's been two years since YLD2 was completed (and Dreamwidth has greater comment limits than LJ, so feel free to ramble). First of all, it's always a compliment when people hoover up the fic...just finishing it is a compliment to me because of its length, but yes, I am sure that you missed many of my Easter eggs that are in there. Did you find EVERY Big Lebowski reference?? Did you hover your cursor over EVERY SINGLE WORD? Well, then, you have some work to do.
Big words: I love interesting words a lot, especially slang and words such as you those you mentioned that have a cool sound to them besides a specific niche meaning. I try not to get carried away with big words when a simple one would do.
While I really love the L/V pairing, because it's so flawed and tentative, these stories were written because I missed the *show*, with all its minor characters and even its flaws, like the red herrings and plot twists that went nowhere. I'm kind of a nut, so as I was writing YLD I'd have the audio of the show playing in my car stereo as I drove around to try to absorb the character voices. You hear a lot that way. I really liked throwing minor characters together that didn't interact much on the show, for instance Wallace and Weevil—both of whom have really interesting speech patterns that are fun to imitate.
One of the overarching ideas that I had for YLD2 was that Logan would start out really damaged, needing Veronica to help him (but pushing her away), and then they would switch, and Veronica would need Logan's help to survive (and she'd push him away). Sure, he's a wallower, and she's a denier, but in a lot of ways, they're two sides of the same coin, and that's one reason they could end up together in some version of the future.
I did want readers to have a real sense of foreboding for both of them as we headed for the tough love school (although most people focused on Veronica's plight and thought it was a "good thing" that Logan would be there too). And then I made it even worse than people thought it could be (you should read my author's notes; if anything, I probably minimized the destructive capabilities of those places).
A couple ideas about Logan's capacity to survive: first of all, Veronica needs him, and that helps him to make it, and second, he'd already hit rock bottom (with his suicide attempt) and while not exactly healthy, he knew that he wanted to live and had developed a support system with his shrink. He'd taken some really positive steps toward healing himself, and he was the one, more than anybody, who saw clearly how dangerous the school would be (but not in the *way* that he thought).
Once the school experience was over, Veronica's tendency towards denial and the way that she always pushes her feelings down out of reach and refused to talk about what was going on made it harder for her to survive. Just having to be passive—and then having to tell her deep emotional secrets to the people she loved—practically killed Veronica.
If I had written this story as a novel, I probably would have had them fighting bitterly once they returned home rather than clinging so hard to each other, and then having to grope their way back together when no one else gets what happened to them. (But it's fanfic, and people clamored for more L/V, so...)
I've said many times that I felt that the overall structure of the story is flawed, because Veronica's unraveling at the end feels like too much (and quite a few commenters have said the same thing). However, those chapters were *really* important to me personally: how do you reinvent yourself when everything you think you know about yourself is destroyed? Not having a perfect structure is probably unavoidable when you post as you go, so I'm not actually beating myself up, but it's something I recognize about the story.
If I was to rewrite this story, I'd also be much more careful about maintaining consistent point-of-view. Since I was mimicking the TV show, with its omniscient POV, we could see everything, but I think really strict third person POV (one person's thoughts at a time) would enhance the story. I did end up rewriting a large section of this right before I finished, because I wasn't happy with the progression of the character arcs.
There are some stories on my master fic list that require you to join my f-list or a special comm to read them. And that's for a few different reasons. I have not withheld access unreasonably, but those stories either can't be public or I only want trusted commenters to be able to give me feedback.
Thank you for leaving me such detailed feedback. I hope someday you'll read the story again at a leisurely pace to see what you missed the first time around. Yes, I am posting another WIP—it's kind of the last gasp of VM fandom in some ways, and I would greatly appreciate getting comments from you as I post. I am working on different areas of my writing, including the POV issues I mentioned above and also descriptive writing and word flow. Thank you for reading my story.
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branchandroot
(no subject)
Date: 2011-07-15 10:14 pm (UTC)Big words: I love interesting words a lot, especially slang and words such as you those you mentioned that have a cool sound to them besides a specific niche meaning. I try not to get carried away with big words when a simple one would do.
While I really love the L/V pairing, because it's so flawed and tentative, these stories were written because I missed the *show*, with all its minor characters and even its flaws, like the red herrings and plot twists that went nowhere. I'm kind of a nut, so as I was writing YLD I'd have the audio of the show playing in my car stereo as I drove around to try to absorb the character voices. You hear a lot that way. I really liked throwing minor characters together that didn't interact much on the show, for instance Wallace and Weevil—both of whom have really interesting speech patterns that are fun to imitate.
One of the overarching ideas that I had for YLD2 was that Logan would start out really damaged, needing Veronica to help him (but pushing her away), and then they would switch, and Veronica would need Logan's help to survive (and she'd push him away). Sure, he's a wallower, and she's a denier, but in a lot of ways, they're two sides of the same coin, and that's one reason they could end up together in some version of the future.
I did want readers to have a real sense of foreboding for both of them as we headed for the tough love school (although most people focused on Veronica's plight and thought it was a "good thing" that Logan would be there too). And then I made it even worse than people thought it could be (you should read my author's notes; if anything, I probably minimized the destructive capabilities of those places).
A couple ideas about Logan's capacity to survive: first of all, Veronica needs him, and that helps him to make it, and second, he'd already hit rock bottom (with his suicide attempt) and while not exactly healthy, he knew that he wanted to live and had developed a support system with his shrink. He'd taken some really positive steps toward healing himself, and he was the one, more than anybody, who saw clearly how dangerous the school would be (but not in the *way* that he thought).
Once the school experience was over, Veronica's tendency towards denial and the way that she always pushes her feelings down out of reach and refused to talk about what was going on made it harder for her to survive. Just having to be passive—and then having to tell her deep emotional secrets to the people she loved—practically killed Veronica.
If I had written this story as a novel, I probably would have had them fighting bitterly once they returned home rather than clinging so hard to each other, and then having to grope their way back together when no one else gets what happened to them. (But it's fanfic, and people clamored for more L/V, so...)
I've said many times that I felt that the overall structure of the story is flawed, because Veronica's unraveling at the end feels like too much (and quite a few commenters have said the same thing). However, those chapters were *really* important to me personally: how do you reinvent yourself when everything you think you know about yourself is destroyed? Not having a perfect structure is probably unavoidable when you post as you go, so I'm not actually beating myself up, but it's something I recognize about the story.
If I was to rewrite this story, I'd also be much more careful about maintaining consistent point-of-view. Since I was mimicking the TV show, with its omniscient POV, we could see everything, but I think really strict third person POV (one person's thoughts at a time) would enhance the story. I did end up rewriting a large section of this right before I finished, because I wasn't happy with the progression of the character arcs.
There are some stories on my master fic list that require you to join my f-list or a special comm to read them. And that's for a few different reasons. I have not withheld access unreasonably, but those stories either can't be public or I only want trusted commenters to be able to give me feedback.
Thank you for leaving me such detailed feedback. I hope someday you'll read the story again at a leisurely pace to see what you missed the first time around. Yes, I am posting another WIP—it's kind of the last gasp of VM fandom in some ways, and I would greatly appreciate getting comments from you as I post. I am working on different areas of my writing, including the POV issues I mentioned above and also descriptive writing and word flow. Thank you for reading my story.